The Wait

“I knew where I was, wasn’t where I would stay.”

These are the wise words from Oprah that met me when I opened up Instagram today. This has been an interesting season. Things have come to passed that I’ve prayed for but at the same time life has been demanding much of me lately.

“For we do not want you to be unaware, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself.”

2 Corinthians 1:8 ESV

Now I’m finding myself in a waiting season. Waiting for the next steps wondering what comes next. What’s next in my career? Will I get married and have kids? Am I aligned with my purpose? Will I ever fully be healthy again? This verse epitomizes the agony, the questioning while also juggling life wondering how I’m going to make it to the next day.

A recent medical emergency forced me pause in my pursuit and sit, be still, and rest in the wait. I learned that I’m right where I’m supposed to be and that I don’t have to do it all. It felt nice to just take care of myself in a time where I felt like I needed to take care of others and just grind to get to the “next”.

Things can get turbulent during a waiting season. Faith can be shaken. Circumstances can leave you feeling a bit unsettled and at its worst can cause for you to fall in despair. Just because we can’t see all the pieces of a situation doesn’t mean that God isn’t working things out on our behalf.

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.”

James 1:2-3 ESV

So today I’m home, getting my life back in order. I needed to come back to my theme verse of the year and remind myself to count it all joy. The year is still just beginning and there are still many joyful moments to come. Things are still turbulent, but I feel ready to tackle it for now and choose to take better care of myself in the Wait. To find joy in the Wait. The big dark cloud is still there and the fog is yet to lift. But, I know that I’m growing in steadfastness and I’m still in the fight. I am confident to know that where I am currently, in time and with much patience, isn’t where I will stay.